Wednesday, October 13, 2010

The Screen Door Compromised

This was the last thing I saw shoot out the front screen door. Now any other time she is shuffling, fumbling or otherwise staggering INTO the house. Now all of a sudden she because fleet of foot and decides to fly. I had to fling my sausage gravy off the oven burner and run like hell after her. Luckily I was dressed. I caught up with her in the neighbors front yard one block away and throw myself across the top of her like a quarterback getting his ass smashed in an NFL game. I wish I had time to illustrate the rest of this show. At this point she goes flat and looses all function of being able to walk. At 70 pounds I can no longer pick her big ass up. I stand her up like a giant sausage and wrap my arms under her arm pits and try to get her to walk on her back legs. Before it was all done it was me picking up a tree branch that motivated her into walking again. Big naughty girl. That is how we started our day.

Maybe I should add I only used the tree branch like a shepherds hook to guide her back with, she was not beaten with it...

HoneyBelle: Oh Nooo! She really beats me!


  1. Oh I can sooooo totally relate....Honeydew our resident houdini escaped 3 times out of her harness while on her run. That is 3 times.I have tried every type harness/collar I can think of, yesterday I called the vets office for advice, he said try the cloth ones that resemble a vest or jacket...I am thinking straight jacket just might work :-/

  2. Ohhh these girls! And they are so heavy! I tried holding on to her rolls and it just stretched out about a foot. She flat refused to walk and was a pool of flesh on the ground.

  3. BAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Gotta love the spirit of the hound! My human seems to think I need 3 collars to go outside, the most important, (and disliked) being the Gentle Leader.

    Good luck with the Houdini sausage!

    Gus, Bloodhound of Alaska

  4. LOL they are so darn quick when they want to be LOL.